|
Please don't
face what you are going through alone. Reach out to someone you know and trust. I know that this may seem impossible right now. But sharing really is the best 'first step'
to leaving these crossroads behind.
You desperately need to feel better - to do this you need
to be able to feel.... If you are dead, your feelings will also be dead - you will not be able to feel better. You will be
dead and your loved one's will be devastated. Suicide will not help you feel better.
- Human contact, emotional support and a good coping strategy
will help you to feel better. Human contact will help you to feel better. Emotional support will save you and those around
you, and a good coping strategy will help you to recover.
- It is vital that you accept one simple truth: Suicide is
not the solution you seek. But the real solution is out there. It is only a question of time till you find it, but find it
you will. BUT ONLY IF YOU STAY ALIVE
- In this situation, it is normal to experience being
torn between life and death - and let's be honest - it’s both scary and confusing. Again, given the situation, it
is perfectly natural and it really is nothing for us to panic about
Let's have another recap.
- We know we are going through Hell because pain is
overwhelming our ability to cope with that pain.
- We urgently need this painful situation to come to
an end. This is why we are contemplating suicide.
- We are not crazy, weird or weak.
- We desperately need "not to be" in the pain we're
in. And not as previously thought, desperately need "to die". There is a whole world of difference.
- Suicidal feelings really do pass.
With
these important things in mind, I hope things are becoming just a little clearer.
- Now, we need to make sure that we take control of this
situation, and not allow this situation to take control of us.
This
will require a good coping strategy and people around us who genuinely care. Hopefully this DASI site will help to find
a good coping strategy.
http://dasisignpost.tripod.com/id3.html
The
difficult bit
- Given that it is your life that is at stake here
- and the sanity of your loved ones. The next step is to transform the struggle from "not to be" (in an intolerable
situation) into "to be" (in a happier one).
- This process requires certain steps and hard work
from us. But this struggle is all inportant and will be worth it. After all death is no real alternative. But we must
not forget, we are not alone. Millions of others have survived feeling suicidal, so why shouldn't we?
- The important thing now is for us to take the really difficult
step and approach someone we can confide in. We must not face our ordeal alone.
- It is imperative that we reach out from where we are. We
need to speak with someone who is prepared to listen. In a perfect world this would be a loved one or relative. But, this
isn't a perfect world.
- However, whoever we choose, it will be not be easy.
Let's be honest It'll be bloody difficult. How does one break such news to people you are close to? It won't be
easy..... But we really have no choice, and in the long run it will be worth it.
- One of the biggest obstacles is not knowing how to explain
the confusion we are feeling. Especially when the person we really need to be speaking with might even be the one 'responsible'
(in some measure) for how we are feeling.
- How we make someone aware of what we are going through
will not be easy, and will vary from person to person. Some people will prefer a direct no nonsense face-to-face
approach. Others may not.
- Whilst some will understand what you are going through
and will be supportive. Others may not be able to understand and will tell us to "pull ourselves together". If we encounter
this response then we are have chosen the wrong person to inform. Hopefully you will not encounter this response.
- Whoever we choose to confide in, and whatever, approach
we choose, it is vital that we open this dialogue.
- One approach might be to not throw them in at the deep
end, but allow them a gentler introduction. This person may have been aware that there is a something seriously wrong
and has been worried about you.
- Slowly explain what you are going through. Perhaps you could even use the DASI website as
a means of breaking the ice. Possibly pointing out a passage to them and adding "this is how I feel". Or "this is what
I'm going through". By doing this together it could be a very positive first step for both of you - I hope.
Other
things you can do...
- We can avoid using alcohol or recreational drugs to block reality out. This usually only serves
to make matters worse. Although it is appealing and often far too convenient to ignore, try to avoid it. The bottom line
here is that suicides are often the result of impulse - and, alcohol can makes us impulsive.
- Try to sleep. Even daytime catnaps will help to calm. If sleep seems impossible, periods of
rest can be a great help. Remember that alcohol is not a sedative it is a sleep disrupter.
- Talk to someone who is a good listener.
- Don't panic you are not going mad.
- As a last resort call The Samaritans (or equivalent organisations if outside the UK and the Republic
of Ireland) or the Emergency Services.
Yet
Another Recap
Most
people have suicidal thoughts and feelings at some point in their lives; this is a natural response when pain overwhelms the
body's capacity to cope with that pain.
Almost
all suicidal people have conditions that will pass with time and/or assistance and/or a recovery programme. In the meantime,
there are hundreds of steps one can take to improve the situation for those of us going through a crisis. These could save
lives and prevent a great deal of human suffering.
|
